Monday, February 2, 2015

DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF





Good afternoon from Adelaide where the sun is shining and the sky is blue - a very different afternoon to what our morning was.  It was grey and dreary first thing today and the wind was cold.     It is windy now and a lovely lovely drying day for all the towels I have hanging on the line.   They will be soft and fluffy and will smell of sunshine and summer.

I have talked before about "odd socks" but this time in more detail.    Does it really matter if they don't match - the purpose is to keep feet clean and dry and warm and odd socks do that just as well as a matching pair - and most times no-one sees the socks besides us.   I have never deliberately gone about to wear "odd" socks, but I confess to having worn them, when in a hurry I have just grabbed what I could and kept going.    I have sandals the same design in different colours and I was mortified when I looked down at my feet at a Concert in the City to find I had odd sandals on.    Comments from friends were loud and funny - I just stated that I had another pair "just like them at home."  

I have lots of Christmas earrings and it is not uncommon to find me with a candy cane earring in one ear and some holly in the other - and that is a deliberate thing.

Whether you choose to do this or it just happens matters not - you make a statement and bring a smile to someone.

In the big picture - does it matter  ?   I believe not and I know as I have aged I have become more blase about things like this.    Once upon a time all the clothes pegs had to match and the colour match the garment and then I was a mother with school clothes and uniforms to wash and get dry and I learned that the clothes dried just as well even if the pegs did not match.    I also learned that the socks dry even if pegged by the top and not the toe.   When my children liked to help and would hang the washing on the line I used to cringe and want to change it - but I learned that it dries just the same and that I could put that energy into other things.   I was ironing the shirts anyway so what did it matter if they were hung by the collar ? !!

My Mother In Law ironed everything and I soon learned that it didn't matter - the teatowels dried the dishes just as well if they are just folded and not ironed and the children slept just as well in pyjamas that were  straight from the line, warm from the sun.   That is the small stuff.

I have learned that fretting in the car because I am late is not going to get me there any sooner, so I just don't sweat it - I just arrive safely as I can.   Waiting at a red light is not going to matter - a minute or two out of my day doesn't matter - when the light turns green it is my turn to go.

Dinner does not have to be on the table promptly at six - we will not starve if we don't eat until seven and I learned that half an hour after a child's bedtime didn't turn them into monsters and that they caught up.

Not sweating the small stuff is about not stressing about the things we can do little or nothing  about - the small things, that, in the big picture don't matter.

I hope you can learn not to sweat the small stuff and to take some deep breaths and enjoy where you are at a precise moment.    Precious things get broken as we go through life, and sad as we are, we have the memory of what it was and all the sweating and fretting in the world won't bring it back.   Bones break and mend,  children get sick and recover and our finances rise and fall and in those situations we need all the energy we can muster to cope without sweating the small stuff.

The realization that there are things I cannot change has brought me to a comfortable stage of my life - I go with the flow and I don't sweat the small stuff - and really it is all small stuff. 

I believe this gives me the strength and peace to calmly cope with the bigger things in life and to stop and be present to the moment and enjoy each day.

Ask yourself the question - I do often, "Will the world go into a holding pattern if .............. (whatever is going on in your life - and if you can answer NO then don't sweat it - breathe deeply and cope with it.

I have always been an early riser and am learning that nothing happens or goes "bang" if I don't get up early or if I have an afternoon nap.   It is okay to be kinder and more gentle with myself.   It is okay to have a shower at two in the morning - nothing bad happens - it is very liberating.

I don't sweat the small stuff and it I am more at peace and happier for it.

Find the small stuff in your life and don't sweat it - take deep breaths and ask yourself "will it matter in ten years time"  and no it won't.   Life will go on and your days will be calmer as you travel through life wearing odd socks or odd earrings.

Thank you for visiting the Musings of My Heart - a heart that is happy to encourage you on your journey and ask you to stop and literally smell the roses, pick some daisies, walk barefoot in the grass or splash in puddles. Most of all to be present to the moment.

Love and hugs,





4 comments:

Margee said...

Hi Linda,
Oh I loved your blog today. I learned the hard way, when I lost my 2yr old daughter. After that I realized "Don't sweat the small things.
Later in 2013 my son passed, I'm glad I gave them all I could in time, love etc. the mismatched socks are ok😊

Linda J. said...

Thank you for sharing about your daughter and your son - I am so glad you gave them your time and didn't worry about the mismatched socks.

My thoughts are with you - the pain doesn't go away, we just learn to live with the empty spaces. xxxx

Unknown said...

Beautiful words as always Linda..you are very articulate and wise...I enjoy reading your pearls of wisdom
Lyn Reeve

Linda J. said...

Thank you Lyn - just words from my heart and ones I have found helpful along the way.
Linda. xxx